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July 14, 2016

Its been years since i logged on to this page. Just do not know what happened and I lost all interest in writing which was my life line once upon a time.

I used to literally breathe my blog. I was so passionate about writing that all my waking hours were spent in thinking about the topics to write.

Was the negative comments from some ones as to “who will read what I am writing, or such a waste of time or No one is interested in reading what I write or its just sheer nonsense” demotivated me or  something other. But the fact remains that I stopped writing and expressing my views

Then suddenly the life came to a standstill. I carried on with my daily life.

and today out of the blue moon I just thought of visiting my own page and

Voila 🙂 i am  here as if arisen from ashes

I cannot believe that i was alive for all these years. Or was I really breathing or just posing to be alive. 🙂

but whatever may be , I am here once again to stay.

I wish myself all the best .



who should die first the wife or the husband?

January 24, 2012

Disclaimer   I have no intention to hurt any one’s feelings or sentiments

While talking to one old widower and another old widow, the idea of this post came

Most of the ladies love and pamper their husbands to no limits, they take care of him (husband),look after his medicines, keep an eye on his movements, monitor his intake of foods, help him select his clothes etc etc. control his cholesterol, sugar , force him to go for walks . In general the wife makes the husband totally dependent on her.

They will rush home after any outing – “he must have come home, I have to give him his tea “

The wife always says “I want to die before my husband, Suhagan marna chahti hu”.

Has she ever thought that if she dies before the husband who will take care of him once she goes? She has made him so much dependent on her, rather made him handicapped to the extent that he will not take his medicine on his own.

Doesn’t she realize that once she dies the husband will be left alone with no one to take care of him, give him medicines?

How can the same woman who can’t bear the thought of leaving her husband alone for a single day think about leaving him for a lonely life without her?

Actually the best solution to save the old couples from depression because of death of the partner,is that the couple should die together so that no one suffers the loneliness, the feeling of left alone, the isolation and the depression


January 21, 2012


Just imagine what would happen if insulting was made a crime and punishable ?let me list all those who will be behind the bars or who will be punished

  1. All the husbands for insulting their wives at every given chance.
  2. Rest of the men for insulting women by abusing them (verbally as well as physically).
  3. All those political leaders who insult the faith reposed on them by public.
  4. All those friends who insult friendship by cheating on them.
  5. All those children who insult their parents.
  6. All those parents who insults their children by their sarcastic comments or expect much more from their children than they are capable of doing.
  7. All those citizens who insult our legal system by violating the laws.
  8. All those people who insult our religious values by talking against any particular religion or misusing the religious places.
  9. All those women who insult  women hood by indulging in acts which are demeaning to all the women
  10. All those beggars who insult the emotions of philanthropists by presenting a false sob story and taking alms from them.
  11. ——
  12. —–
  13. ——

The list is unending

If all these people are punished, our judiciary and legal system will have a tough time by putting them behind the bars

BUT the question is who will punish the insulters?

The law makers, the reformers, the judiciary themselves insult the legal system, rules and regulations.

So if there is no one to impart punishment what is the alternative?

Go on getting insulted and go on insulting others ????????????????

P.S  can you add more categories of people who insult others?


Islamic cleric bans women from touching bananas, cucumbers for sexual resemblance

December 7, 2011

i am at loss for words after reading this

CAIRO: An Islamic cleric residing in Europe said that women should not be close to bananas or cucumbers, in order to avoid any “sexual thoughts


November 25, 2011

I wrote

one single slap but a powerful , shows  people are getting tired of our netas

this is just the beginning, aagey aagey dekho kya hota hai

jaag raha hai India

but some people don’t think so. they think that the slap should not have taken place

The slap — is it justifiable? every one has his own views.

I do concede that slapping an elderly figure is wrong, but try to imagine the frustration of sufferers, the victims of bad politics, the helplessness of common man, the circumstances that motivated this extreme step.

The act may have been wrong but the intention  behind it shows that now the common man will not blindly follow the leaders.

They are slowly opening their eyes, they are slowly but steadily realizing their rights, and they are gradually gearing up enough energy to raise their voice against exploitation and bad politics.

For how long can we tolerate our corrupt political system?

This Royal slap should not be taken as an initiation for many more such to follow.

But it should be taken as the alarm for the leaders, it should be treated as warning signal

It should generate fear in our well established political system and our leaders.

It should give a jolt to them and they should  realize  that  a new era with a brighter sun is emerging,

They should become alert that the AAM JANATA is all set to become KHAS and they will not let any one (be it an elderly man or some regal personality ) rule over and take them for granted.

Today’s generation is ready to respect the elders but the elders should by their conduct earn that respect.

What is important is that the Acts and not the age should be respected

AAJ KI JANATA is all set to fight for their rights.

They are awakening from their slumber.


November 15, 2011

I know eavesdropping is bad manners and uncultured but one cannot avoid overhearing other’s conversation while travelling in public transport and I admit to my guilt of eavesdropping

Following are some of my musings after eavesdropping a conversation between two women travelling in a local transport

Are men specially created by God?

Can they never do any wrong?

What is that special quality which the men have which makes them feel that they are superior to women?

What is that special quality which makes men treat women like door mat?

What is the unique thing in men that makes men ill treat women?

What is so special in men that inspite or the humiliation, insults, abuse which they subject their women to, they still get respect, concern and obedience from women?

Why do most of the men always blame the women for any crisis/calamity /financial loss/ downs in the career/mishappenings/family disputes?

Are the men always right?

Don’t they have any responsibility towards family?

Why is that any thing good is because of the husbands and any thing which is not favorable is the doing of the women?

Does the principles of life after death, Paap and Punya, Hell and heaven doesn’t apply to men?

Does the philosphy of “BURA KAROGE TO BURA MILEGA” not applicable to men?

Are they not scared that they will have to suffer for the deeds of this birth in their next birth?

Why do women silently tolerate this inhumane behavior?

Is it because of fear of society/family/financial security/future of children/they enjoy the insults/or they have just got used to this attitude and have given in to the situation

What will happen if the women gear up and enough courage to get up and say

“Thanks for giving me the chance to find someone better that you”

A heart touching line told by a woman to her husband
“I do not hate you but I have lost all the reasons to love you”

parents of yesterday and today

October 8, 2011

Watching a hindi serial and for a change it is showing harsh reality of life—parents go to any extent to give love and fulfill all wishes of children and they want their children to love them but the same parents forget that they also have their parents who expect the same from them. Why this contradiction? People want their children to love, respect them but the same parents become a stranger to their own parents

Reminds me of a old story which my father used to tell me

Old father feeling cold so the son along with his wife asks his small son (grandson) to give a old tattered blanket to the grandfather

The small child tears the blanket into half and gives half to grandfather and tells his father that the other half is for him when he will become old


Why are we so selfish?

Parents want the best for their children; they feel proud at the smallest achievement of their children, they share sleepless nights with their children during exams or during the sickness of children

The same parents how can they just close their eyes, hearts and mind to the fact that even their own parents had been through the same drill when the second generation parents were young.

Do they think that they are the only parents in this earth who are concerned about their children? ?


Is fair complexion a surety for success?

October 4, 2011

The obsession of us Indians with fair complexion is scaling new heights day by day.
Earlier fair complexion used to be must criteria for finding a good match in marriage market
But these days fair complexion has become an important prerequisite for getting success in life
If you are fair you get singing assignments, job promotions, new business opportunities, awards.
One can even buy bungalows, car or respect in the family/society.
New job avenues immediately come in the path of people who have suddenly become fair (thanks to the mushroom growth of fairness creams)
Not only girls even the boys have becomes obsessed with fair complexion
What happened to the Tall Dark Handsome concept?
Now days it has become Tall Fair Handsome.
I am sorry to say that anyone with dark complexion has got no hopes in life. His /her future is surely doomed.
Knowledge, creativity, caliber, intelligence has become secondary.
The essence of the day is fair complexion
Until or unless you are fair in colour you will not get confidence to face the world, the job interview, or finish your assignments,
So girls and boys, man and woman what are you doing? Go and grab some fairness cream else you will find yourself on the bottom step of the ladder of life.

Is being concerned about women right a crime?

March 26, 2011

Some of the comments i have heard in past few days

“Are You a feminist? You ,like other feminists are scaring the young girls off from marriage/ you and your talks about in laws problems, bad mother in laws is seeding the saplings of doubts in girls/ you people are instigating the young women /you people are influencing the young minds/ “tum log soye hue shero ko jaga rahi ho/—-, you are instigating gullible women to raise their voice against their husband and in laws/ you are causing family breakups so on and so forth”

“All these talks about women liberation, women rights, equality between the spouse is fuelling the women, you are provoking them, you are leading them to a path of marital discord, you want to break the happy married lives etc etc/ or maybe you yourself are victim so through your talks you are letting the whole world know your story otherwise how would you know so much about women’s issues”

Someone in a very sarcastic tone commented the other day —Ok so you are a feminist and gave me one of those funny looks.” You only write against men’, your posts on your blog are anti men. Are you a men hater? And if you are feminist and talk so much about women equality then why do you wear saris?

Does being feminist mean that one has to wear only pants?

How is my dress related to what I feel?

Is it that if some one wants to raise their voice against the violence on women then she should only wear pants?

I have been too stunned to react to these comments.

Is talking about women’s right a crime?

Why do people frown upon and look down on the word feminist. Is feeling concerned about some injustice being done a matter to be criticised?

Does raising  one’s voice against violation of human rights, or talking about openly about the pathetic conditions of some of the women makes me different from other women?

Yes i love donning all those things which we women are famous for , but it doesn’t meant that i cannot feel concerned about the women related issues

When i read about sexual assaults on women, the helplessness of women who are raped it pains me.

When i come across women being tortured, beaten, insulted by their in laws or husband i feel

Vulnerable and it hurts me.

When i read about women being victimized because of their sex I just don’t know what to do.

When i read about women abused, about domestic violence, about dowry demands, about the insults parents have to bear just because they have daughters I feel like crying.

When i read about how young girls get disillusioned with the institution of marriage, when their dreams of happy married life gets shattered just because of the over possessive mother in laws and their proprietorship rights over their sons

or when i come across young girls who were full of life and spirit and who suddenly find their spirited wings chopped, who find themselves entangled in the saas bahu  dramas I don’t know how to face them.

Or when i see parents of girls bowing down to unreasonable dictates of parents of sons just because the high mighty parents of son think that they have suddenly become very great

Or when the parents of marriageable sons suddenly start placing unreasonable demands on the parents of girls, or the girl’s parents start bowing down to the dictates of the boys side just because the boy and his parents have very generously consented to oblige the girl by allowing their son to get married to the girl   what is one supposed to do?

Just sit quietly and watch member of my sex being victimised, insulted, treated like some furniture or door mat, or just an object of sexual gratification or a punch bag on whom the husband can vent out all anger and shortcomings?

And tell me what are we doing?

How many of so called feminists have really helped the women who are abused?

Just writing and sharing our fears, our concern and views?

And i don’t think there is any restriction of airing our thoughts, after all we all have freedom of speech and expression.

do we raise daughters to get killed by inlaws?

March 10, 2011

Do the parents cherish, pamper, educate and treat like princess their daughters so that they get humiliated, ill-treated, insulted, murdered or forced to commit suicide by the hands of inlaws and husbands?

I cannot just imagine the shock of the parents when they come to know about the death ( either by murder or by suicide due to the atrocities of inlaws and husbands).

In this particular case the parents must be worked hard to make their daughter a chartered accountant, a degree which many boys struggle hard to get. The victim must have slogged like many other chartered accountants to obtain this degree; she must have put in extra efforts to make a place for herself in this male dominated profession.

9 years of marriage, two children, a good profession — even then the victim committed suicide, not only that she flung her two children first and then she jumped.

How torturous the situation must have become, how much she must have endured before taking this extreme step?

To kill one’s children and then kill her –clearly indicates that the inlaws and husband must have crossed their limits to hurt her. Their insults must have been beyond her endurance level. That is why she took the decision to end her life. Not only that to kill the children also means she was not sure of her children being taken care of after her death.

Why did she tolerate such a behaviour from her inlaws? What is the use of such high education? Why did she not leave her marriage, her husband and in laws?

She was financially independent, educated and from a good family—then why did she not go back to her parent’s house, why she did not inform her parents about it?

Was it the fear of “LOG KYA KAHENGE’ or the societal pressures, or the fear of her parents and she becoming a laughing stock, or did the parents forced her to compromise, adjust and tolerate the humiliation. Was she forced to comply to “ sasural se earthy he nikalni chahiye. Enter the in laws house as a bride and leave as a dead body” ?

the father says that the inlaws were harassing their daughter. if he knew about the harassment then why did he not do any thing about it? Was he along with his rest of the family testing the patience of the victim?Were they waiting to applaud  her endurance capacity?

This is the common story in all cases of brides getting murdered or forced to commit suicide. The parent are aware of the hellish life their daughter is living but even then they do not do any thing about it. just some advice to her to adjust, compromise and become an ideal hindi serials type bahu– go on suffering and suffering. Probably they wait for some miracle to happen which will convert the stone hearted inlaws and husbands into loving, caring human beings who will treat their daugther in laws/wives with dignity , respect and love.

I shiver when I think about the future of women in their matrimonial life

Do we raise our daughters, marry them just to get humiliated and insulted and then killed  by the acts of some beasts called as inlaws and husbands?